Things That Just Piss Me Off

I like tv as much as the next guy, but some things are just so ridiculous I can’t stand it. Here are some of them.

1. World Premiere! Ok, this is a movie that made millions of dollars at the post office and a million people saw it, then it was released on video where tons more people rented it and watched it, then HBO showed it 15 times per month for over a year. Then when one of the networks shows the movie, they call it a World Premiere.

2. CGI at the bottom of the screen. It’s not enough to use over half the time to show us commercials, we have to have little things popping up at the bottom of the screen during the show. Nothing like watching a really scary movie and really getting into it, just to see Dog The Bounty Hunter Popup at the bottom to make my movie-watching experience better. CGI is to tv what popups are to the internet.

3. Cable Commericials. I pay for cable, they show me commercials, and just when I think they are about to take me back to the show I was watching, they want to tell me how great cable tv is and why I should also use it for my phone service.

4. Speaking of commercials. I know this is an old complaint. But isn;t there any such thing as consumer protection or false advertising anymore? Where is Ralph Nader when we need him? A truck can stop a 30,000 pound aircraft on a runway? Give me a break. Companies used to have to answer for false advertising. The FTC used to actually do something when comapanies used false advertising. Now they just do as they please.

And the phartmaceutical companies are the worst. They advertise some drug with a woman running through a field all happy and try to make you want to have whatever problem she has so you can take the drug and be happy too! Then they give you the disclaimers at the end like, this may cause internal bleeding without prior warning, stomach lacerations, and kidney failure in rare instances. But they still tell you the drug is wonderful!

5. HBO. Do they really have to show the same movie over and over and over and over and over and over again? They give you one movie per week that you may not have seen if you live in a cave on a mountain in Thailand and charge you $10-$15 per month to do so.

Then I really love it when I am a subscriber and I have to sit through their commercials about HBO everytime they give nonsubscribers a free month to try and get them to sign up too. I already paid my money! Why do I have to listen to HBO try to sell people who are getting the service for free that I paid for?

6. Reality Shows. Can this get anymore ridiculous? The networks create them for two reasons. 1. It costs them less money than a show that requires writers and actors. 2. People will watch anything.

I just can’t wait for “Survivor; Outer Space Edition”.

Maybe we should hold elections for president with a reality show. All the candidates are followed around for months and filmed doing the various stupid stuff they do, especially what they do in airport bathrooms and alone with their aides and pages, then the tv audience can just call in their votes and be done with the whole chad-hanging process.

7. Fox News. I keep hearing the fox news anchors talking about how biased other reporters are. Give me a break. This fake news channel is a republican propaganda machine and they are so obvious about it that anyone who is honest about it can say they know it. Stop defending them as if they are something other than this, please.

I’m not a democrat or a republican. But fair and balanced? Not a chance. They claim they are fair and balanced because they have shows like hannity and coombs, a republican and a democrat. Yet they choose hannity who can talk louder, not actually more intelligently, but definitely louder, than anyone else on his show including coombs. They pick coombs to represent democrats and he couldn’t out-debate a third grader.

So the idea is to make it look like the republicans have a stronger argument by putting on a loudmouth republican who can out-talk the weaker personality who represents the democrats. half the time it looks like allen coombs is afraid that hannity is going to beat him up.

8. Baseball Interruptions. Look, I’m not a big fan of baseball. I played it all through little league and high school and love playing the game. I just can’t sit6 through games that end up 1-0 after three hours of play. I can’t watch golf or fishing for the same reason.

But the other day, I was halfway through a movie and the network breaks in to show me a baseball game instead of letting me finish the movie. What? This was a nonscheduled game that just happened suddenly like breaking news? They didn’t know what time the game would start before just now? They couldn’t have scheduled the movie to end before the game? No prior warning? Someone just called the station and said, “Hey! I just saw the Yankees and the Padres playing baseball! Get some cameras over there and cover the game, quick!”

Well, thats just the 8 things I could think of right now. You are welcome to add some more if you like.

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